Introduction to The Gita
For a spring morning, it was ferociously hot. The dust kicked up by the hooves of the thousands of horses felt like baked hot wooden sphincters puncturing the face but this was war, and it hadn’t begun yet. Two massive armies stood facing each other gauging the others’ might before the conch is blown to signal the start. They would fight until sunset.
But one brave warrior stood atop his chariot, at the center, bisecting the space between the armies. He looked ahead at his cousins, his teachers, his ancestors, his relatives… He was going to kill them all if he was to survive. He turned around to see his brothers behind him. Each of them eager to fight and prepared for the struggle.
The lone warrior wiped the sweat from above his brow, and raised his armoured left arm to reveal his gold plated Piaget sundial, and sighed as he spoke.
“Keshav, there is just six hours to sunset. I’m afraid if we don’t begin the fight soon, this sundial will be of no use.”
The charioteer smiled a wry smile and spoke with firm conviction demanding the listener’s complete attention.
“Arjun, my friend. Don’t be in haste. I have something to tell you…”
Or you may as well call it Manufacturing. But not to be confused with another term that spells the same and refers to something that the Politicians and babus of this great nation are found lacking in.
What I am venturing out to say is that what you see as a whole, being rolled out of an assembly line is more glossy than the sins hidden underneath. I have acquainted myself with these sins and, I admit to have also sinned just to avoid additional rework (like we don’t have enough to deal with already!). Cables getting stuck at the ‘U’ Bolt at the rear axle can only be replaced by removing the tyres and the brake drum and the dust covers – a process that can take up to two hours including re-fitment. Or I could just snap the wires and make a new joint with the use of a wire-cutter and bits of insulation tape – a process that takes a mere four minutes. I think if one is a regular jolly good fellow of the species, one would choose the latter solution. It saves time, effort (and therefore is efficient) and is not easily noticed by inspectors especially if the vehicle in question passes all the functional tests which it is bound to (after all, nothing’s wrong with it). So much for engineering and design for assembly. Ethical cheating – no harm done.
My last week was pathetic and pathetic is the word that best describes it. Quite a contrast to the present one where I am able to find time to notice that the abdomen actually swells up when I inhale and recedes when I exhale (have you noticed this?).
There is an opening next year to get into Human Resource and Welfare which is something I could be considering (should be). It is the life of bliss I’ve been looking for and totally outside of all the struggle. The opportunity rests on the retirement of a particularly charming personality. The retirement is certain but the uncertainty lies in yours truly getting appointed to take the gentleman’s place. God, we need to have a chat, say what?
Just an update: CFSFN now costs 23 smackers. If you had bought one soon after I reviewed it (see ‘Chocolate Sunday’), you could have saved some money and if you liked it, you could have saved upwards of 30 bucks!
… And a couple of metal toothpicks (alright two pop rivets if you may) and you can start up any truck in the factory for a short drive. In fact now that I think about it, you really don’t even need a screw-driver, you may as well use a strip of metal, 2-inch nails or anything remotely resembling a key.
A good colleague of mine showed me how it is done. You just twiddle around with the two pop rivets at the fuse-box whilst simultaneously sticking something metallic in the ignition switch – and hey presto, you’re up and ready to roll!
There’s a second method but it involves more than just a little agility on your part. Can you fit in completely in a 4-by-4 cardboard carton? If yes, maybe you could just get under the dashboard cluster behind the steering wheel shroud and short the terminals at the ignition switch. A smarter way is to get the hood in the front opened and reach your hand across the radiator and do what has just been described. Opening the hood isn’t easy, the bloody thing is the heaviest piece of steel I’ve ever come across for use as a bonnet. Car bonnets are feather compared to these.
GRAND THEFT LORRY WARNING: Don’t Rob Lorries. Even if you do wish to get rid of them later, you won’t be able to. I do believe there are better getaway options. Moreover, you can’t hide the confounded things especially after they’ve been painted with all the colours in the spectrum (I really can’t understand how they can paint a lorry blue with yellow and orange flowers!!)
And cars feel different now. They are too close to the ground. I’ve been in every kind of truck that is made in the factory and now I get a fair idea of blind distance in-front of the truck. I see everything from a height of at least 5.5 feet from the ground and last evening when I got a ride back home in a Ford Ikon that belonged to a colleague, it felt weird – like we’d slide right under a damn lorry and why is the road so close to me? And why am I not able to hear the underbody rubbing against the highway tarmac? Why does it feel so light?
Today, I was in road test with a good driver. He performed what is called by most Need For Speed enthusiasts, a ‘drift’ on a standard bend at 70 km/h. In a truck, this feels like it will tip over but the tyres at the rear just slide laterally and transfer a whole lot of momentum to the left (in my case) against its natural movement that bears it onward in space. The driver then has this race-driving passion, he floors the pedal until you hear the engine hiss (or maybe it’s the Turbocharger) and the truck takes off on a long straight stretch at over 90 km/h. He tests the brakes right at the end. This vehicle wasn’t equiped with ABS (for those less familiar – Anti-lock Braking System) so the wheels at the rear simply lock up and leave skid marks. It was important that the man at the wheel held the steering firmly. What a ride! If only I was authorized to let you come by and experience the road test, you’d have loved it. You’ll never feel the same about a roller coaster ever. You might fall asleep in it. The Ford Ikon can go eat cake.
I know what you’re thinking – there should have been an ‘e’ rather than a ‘y’ in the title of this post. But that little assumption is something you’ve made from your a priori experience that when the good day of the week is preceded by names normally relating to flavors and flavoring agents, one must substitute the ‘y’ for an ‘e’ and make it cold and sweet. Well, at this point I find it needless but I’ll say it anyway that you’ve got the whole damn thing all wrong. You see, August 30 really was a Sunday and a very deliciously chocolaty one too.
After a few hours of shopping with a dear friend of mine, I got back home in the evening feeling quite exhausted. I gathered up enough will to walk down to a supermarket nearby for a quick bite, only to find myself indulging in chocolaty items only. My eyes simply ignored anything that wasn’t chocolate. So after an absolutely mouthwatering and refreshing chocolate pastry with chocolate flakes and icing, a drink of chocolate flavoured milk and a small chocolate candy that came instead of loose change, I picked up Cadbury’s® Five-Star Fruit & Nut® chocolate bar (hereafter mentioned simply as CFSFN).
CFSFN is the best chocolate item I have had in a long time. For those abstaining from sugar, it is potentially lethal but I am happy I am not one of those (there is a God, trust me). It takes a regular person like moi just three minutes to consume it whilst feeling the juices from the raisins, caramel and the chocolate mixing up homogeneously and flowing smoothly down the oesophagus; and the juices way below in the gut eagerly wait to welcome this freshness to bathe and rejoice in its splendor.
During those wonderful three minutes, it is very easy to forget that the goings on around you are not reality. So fellow inhabitants of this blessed land that harbors oodles of this CFSFN, go forth and taste it, albeit just once and you’ll probably want more and more until you can eat no more; then you can recommend it to others the way I’ve just done. Amen!
IMPORTANT NOTE: There is also Cadbury’s® Bournville which is great for dark chocolate lovers (I mean, the chocolate is dark). That is more…well…uhm.. sugar-free.
For once, we shall not get in to details with regard to what took me so long. We will blame popular lethargy, Newton’s law of inertia of rest and the 3rd Law of Thermodynamics (Entropy approaching zero, life holds still and some such). Newton’s inertia of rest was short-lived. Yours truly now toils at work in Hosur, Tamil Nadu. The work (pre-work training) in itself is quite interesting at the moment, but what’s of even more interest is the sporting activities we employees are engaging in. The instructions are clear- we must keep ourselves fit by playing every evening or morning as we like. So while I am observing processes in the production unit, I am getting better and better at Table Tennis and Badminton; there’s no one here who has till date beaten me at either of the two. Worthy opponents are hard to come by. Thou shan’t be modest.
(Moving on )
You can always tell when squirrels are visiting your room while you’re gone. They leave the smallest of the crumbs behind on the window sill. I am quite alright with it so long as these cute little things don’t cut wire-cables or chew off the sheets. I am depending a lot on the fact that they know their way out if disturbed. The last thing we’d want is to witness the occupant and trespasser jumping about in chaotic frenzy, the former trying to get rid of the latter.
Be fore-warned, posts will be rare henceforth (may be interpreted as “consider yourself lucky”)
